They say “tragedy” is the true test of friendship”……..
Many would say….”If a friend cannot be there for you when you really need them, then they’re not a real friend”. But that’s not always the case….…
When my parents died a few years ago….there were people whom I was not very close…….but ironically, were by my side or on my doorstep continuously throughout the weeks and months following their death. Then, there were others whom I hold very dear to my heart and would have given anything to hear their voice, feel their hug…….even to hear what a shitty day they had at work would’ve been a pleasant distraction…….but nothing.
For some reason……..reasons I may never know……they were unable to be there for me when I needed them most. and even though it hurt…….I never judged them. I knew these people and I knew the depth of their souls and the capacity for love they have inside of them.
Tragedy can bring out many different emotions in many different people. This does not reflect on how much they love us or how much they care for us………only on their own ability to face what we may be going through.
In my situation, maybe my suffering was forcing them to face feelings and fears in their own lives that maybe they did not want or were not ready to face yet . Or, maybe they felt I needed them to be strong for me……and if unable to do so, then it was better to distance themselves.
There are many possibilities and none of them with hurtful intent…….and as I would expect people to allow me to grieve or suffer in my own way, I must allow people to react in their own way as well, even if it hurts. If not, then I would be just as less of a friend to expect more from people then they are able to give.
So in the face of tragedy, or in everyday life……
Heartache Passes……..But True Friendship Never Dies 🙂
Ask Me I've Been There...... 